Sunday, May 2, 2010

New Thoughts

Modesty.

I’m starting to see this in a new light. You know, modesty isn’t just about being modest. It’s about being considerate of those around you. What might actually be pretty decent clothing can still make some people uncomfortable. Specifically, guys.

Before, when people would say things like this, I would just roll my eyes. “I’m not immodest, okay? If your mind goes there, that’s your problem.”

While I still sort of believe that, it’s kind of mean when you think about it. Sure, guys need to be able to control their minds, but we don’t need to make it harder for them! Guy and girl minds work differently. Basically, guys are just more physical, and their instincts are more physical. The strongest, most amazing Christian guy is going to struggle sometimes. It’s not fair for us girls to parade around, leaving the self-control to all to them. It’s just not fair.

As nice people, not to mention Christians, we should try our best not to make others stumble and fall. Guys try really hard, y’all. (Well, most of them.) How fair is it if we don’t try at all?

This has never really been a personal thing for me, but I feel like it is now. I’m seeing this issue in a whole new light, and it’s incredibly eye-opening.

I’m not saying girls should dress only in long sleeves and skirts. Not at all. I’m also not saying that the responsibility of keeping minds pure rests completely on girls. Not at all. I’m saying it should be a joint effort. Guys, don’t go there. Girls, don’t lead them.

Be considerate, okay? Be fair. Be modest.

The word is taking on a whole new meaning for me.

~Kendra

12 comments:

Bekah said...

Okay, first of all, I know TOTALLY what you mean. It's a constant struggle, a day-to-day CHOICE - that's modesty. That's purity. That's abistence (sp?). And beautiful post - loved this part:

"Guys, don't go there. Girls, don't lead them."

I just forgot what I was going to say. Hm. I hate when I do that.

Anyways - beautiful post.

Love,
Bekah

Izori said...

Great post, Kendra!

Einar said...

THANK YOU. I can quite easily say as a guy it REALLY irritates me when I get to clean up my own mind for asking someone else to dress differently.

Young ladies who show no discretion despite knowing better or being told to should be ashamed of themselves. Controlling my own mind is akin to sitting on a wild stallion that desn't like me much, and not even knowing how to controll the tamest of ponies.

Revealing clothing might as well be a paintball gun trained on said stallion's rear, doesn't make things any easier.

Einar said...

That would be *Told to clean up my own mind... I need to start checking my posts before I hit publish, writer or not...

Bethany said...

thanks for this post Kendra, it pretty much sums up my opinions on modesty.
Sorry to say this, but I try to dress modestly for the GUYS' sakes, not my own. Sometimes I used to get a bit irritated at implications that I should dress that way for MY OWN sake, I don't care about that.....bah, I guess the only good thing you could say about me that way is that I try not to hurt guys. I could be a lot better, and I could be worse.

Kyrenius-X2 said...

Good post Kendra. :)

Einar said...

Exactly Bethany! There would not BE any such thing as immodesty if we guys didn't have such overactive minds to worry about controlling.

Really that is why modesty is often considered a non-issue by many people, it is a sin that can be committed by EITHER one or the other, or both, but never just one by him or herself, sin in this manner requires both a guy AND a girl to participate, with either the guy looking when he shouldn't, or the gal showing what she shouldn't. A gal can't really be immodest on her own.

Levi said...

I find it refreshing to find girls who ‘get it.’ Even if they never say anything Christian guys notice and appreciate it when a girl dresses modestly.
It’s a difficult issue for both sexes to deal with but an important one.
Thanks for posting!

Tunafish said...

Man, it really irritates me when girls wear really distracting stuff. But I really appreciate it when girls dress modestly. It really shows that they're mature and considerate. There's this one girl at my school who wears not the best of clothing. It's gotten so that I just never look at her. I've actually forgotten what she looks like which is a shame because if she would respect herself by dressing nicely she'd be pretty darn attractive. I hope her heart changes. Most of the girls I see are pretty good about dressing respectively and I really appreciate it. Those thoughts still come, but it's allot easier to send them away than it could be. And GOD's helping me. All the time =) Jesus loves you!

Rachel B said...

Hey! I awarded you over on my blog, girly!

Rachel
bookshiddencorner.blogspot.com

Milli said...

I know what you mean and I completely agree!

Kendra Logan said...

Thanks, y'all! I'm glad you appreciated the post so much :D

~Kendra