Tuesday, March 31, 2009

My List of the Evening

To be honest, I had a terrible evening. I think... I'm going to list good stuff and bad stuff and try to make myself be positive by forcing myself to come up with at least one more good thing than bad. Here it goes:

1. We had to go shoe shopping. (BAD)
2. I was in a bad mood. So was my mom. (BAD)
3. I found a PERFECT pair of shoes that I LOVED, and that made my giant feet look good! (GOOD)
4. They didn't have my size in stock. (SUPER SUPER BAD)
5. The shoe department guy offered to call other stores in our area to see if they had my size (GOOD)
6. They didn't. (BAD)
7. My mom and I had a small fight and she walked out of the store. (BAD)
8. She kindly (sort of) offered to take me to other shoe stores. (GOOD)
9. I saw nothing I liked at the first three. (BAD)
10. I saw some I liked at store four. (GOOD)
11. They didn't actually have the shoe, it was just on display (WHAT?!). (BAD)
12. I never found shoes to wear to this thing I have to have shoes for on Friday night. (BAD)
13. My mom and I went to Wal-Mart very mad. (BAD)
14. We saw these really awesome friendly people that we know there who cheered me up a little. (GOOD!)
15. We found everything we wanted at Wal-Mart. (GOOD)
16. The cashier lady was sloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooower than Christmas. (BAD)
17. The stupid deoderant thingie didn't have a barcode on it so the mean cashier lady wouldn't let us buy it even though we were also buying a practically identical one (GRRRR). (BAD)
18. We went to Starbucks.
19. The lady who helped us was sooooooo nice and sympathetic about our crappy evening. (GOOD)
20. My double chocolate chip frappichino was very good. (GOOD)
21. My mom and became friends again over coffee ;) (GOOD)
22. I read some of the book I brought with me. (GOOD)
23. We were late picking up my sister from dance class. (BAD, not too bad though)
24. I wanted a Rice Krispie treat, and my mom forgot that she said I could walk over to the store next door and get it, so she was mildly upset. (A little bit BAD)
25. She drove me to the store (like forty feet away from the dance place, lol). (GOOD)
26. The guy who checked out my stuff was verrrrrrrrrrrry nice.
27. I decided to be generous (haha) and buy my mom and sister a treat, too. (GOOD)
28. They were happy with me. (GOOD)
29. We listened to my iPod on the way home. (GOOD)
30. My dog was happy to see me when we got home :) (GOOD)

Okay, wow. That really helped. I came up with 12 bad things, and 15 good things (only that's imposisble because I have 30 things....oh well. Dont' feel like recounting :) ). And I don't feel so upset and sad now! Man, I should try this more often! ;) Carpe diem!

"Daughter of Venice", Among Other Things

Philosophy project: success!!

Debate: not so much success. Both teams were a bit disappointing, and no winner was announced. Oh well. Learning process!

My sister is accusing me of "stealing the love" of our...dog. Yes, our DOG. Lol! The dog is actually mine, but ever since my parents started letting me sleep later, my sister has been feeding the dog. This afternoon when we got home from class, I gave the dog some fresh water, and my sister flipped out, lol! I have to admit, though, that I am a little sad at the prospect of Licky transferring her affections and want to prevent that from happening.

I don't know why I'm using big words. I haven't even been reading any big-word books lately...

I'm actually reading this book called Daughter of Venice. I've read it before though. It's interesting. It's written in first person, present tense (As I sit outside, I dangle my feet in the water...). It takes place in Venice (hence the title, duh) but I'm not sure exactly when. A long time ago sort of. The girls almost never get to leave the house, so it can't be but so contemporary.

It's not one of my favorite books, but I'm liking it more than ever this time around.

It's about a girl of a wealthy family. Now, in Venice, only one son and one (maybe two) daughters get married off. I don't remember what the other boys do, but the other girls are sent to convents for the rest of their lives (yikes!). The main character, Donata, is the second oldest. Sort of. She has a twin sister, Laura. So, there's a secret possibility that both of them could be married off, since they're both sort of the second daughters. Make sense? Well, Laura is the perfect daughter and future daughter-in-law, while Donata (main character) is more of your typical outcast-girl. So, Donata is fairly certain she will end up in a convent. Because she almost never gets to see the outside world, and once she gets put in a convent, she never will, she disguises herself as a boy and ventures out into Venice. She isn't nearly as ready as she thinks to face the outside world, but she learns a lot and meets some interesting people. She also gains the courage to eventually make a descision that changes her life and her family's life forever.

Haha, yeah...anyway, I have to go now because we're going to take a "family picture" outside the house and send it to my great uncle, who hasn't seen our house yet. So, talk to ya later!

P.S. Oh, I got given "grace" on the paper that I forgot to write and now I have to turn it in tomorrow. Yay! Oh, and that research paper that I've been working on is due a week from today and I don't feel very good about it... I know what I gotta do...

Carpe diem! :)

Monday, March 30, 2009

A Lil' Bit of Everything


Well, I know y'all are just dying to hear about my philosophy project and its progress, so here it comes ;) IT'S GOING GREAT! Lol, I bet you didn't see THAT one coming, did you? I finished it up today, and my mom said it's really good. Wow! Who would have thought??

I'm a little sad that I don't get to debate again tomorrow (lol), but watching the next round should be fun. Lionkinglover14 and Kirsten (not a blogger) go against Amandaa and Chris G. I feel safe to say that I believe the former will win for two reasons. One: they don't read this blog :P and Two: I happen to know that Chris G and Amandaa weren't a fifth of the way finished on Saturday. Still, there is hope. They're definitely super smart when they put their minds to it :) Lionkinglover14 and Kirsten were finished completely, like, Wednesday :D

Well, we had to read "The Old Man and the Sea" this week. And--


I just realized I haven't written the paper on that book. And it's like dinner time the day before. *gulp* I can either do it really fast and no-so-good, or I can beg my parents to give me a couple of days to do it. Either way, I'm probably in trouble...oops :)

Anyway, I didn't like the book a whole lot. It was really simple and didn't have much plot. I didn't even think the moral was particularly good. At least it was short though :) 127 pages in like 14 point font double spaced. I read it in like two sittings (the first sitting doesn't even count because I only read like four pages, lol).

Well, that's all I think...yup. BYE!

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Personality Quiz Reveals All ;)

Okay, so the picture has nothing to do with what I'm going to blog about (a personality quiz), but Iit was so cool I just had to share it! It's kind of peaceful and energetic at the same time. (I am really not a super artsy person, so I don't know why I'm going all Look-At-This-Picture-I-Randomly-Found-On-Google-Images on you.)

My personality according to this (comments are in parenthesis): http://www.colorquiz.com/

*Rating: * * * * * Five out of five. This is a seriously accurate quiz.

* My existing situation: Needs excitement and constant stimulation. Willingly participates in activities that are thrilling and offer adventure. (Pretty much true.)

* My Stress Sources: "Demands to be noticed by others as an important individual, needs attention and recognition. Her current situation is leaving her dissatisfied. She feels she needs to make friends with those who hold the same high standards she does. Wants to stand out as someone at the top of her class and be admired by others. She needs to feel in control which makes it difficult to give of herself to another person. She feels isolated and alone but refuses to appear weak and continues to be emotionally distant from others in order to keep her attitude of superiority. " (*jaw drops and I am unable to speak for a moment* Uh...yeah...Short version: I am a sometimes-arogant control freak!!)

* My Restrained Characteristics: "Giving more than she is getting back and feels misunderstood and unappreciated." (Maybe a little bit.) "Feels she is being forced into compromising and even her close relationships leave her feeling emotionally distant." (Yes.) "Is bothered when her needs and desires are misunderstood and she feels there is no one to turn to or rely on." (Sooort of...yes.) "Her self-centered attitude can cause her to be easily offended." (*scowls* Ouch. Apparently I have some character issues to work out...)

* My Desired Objective: "Feels stressed due to her current situation or relationships, and needs to make changes. Looking for a solution that will increase her chances of fulfilling her current hopes and dreams." (Wow. This is officially the most freakishly accurate personality quiz I have ever taken in my life [and y'all know I've taken quite a few]).

* My Actual Problem: "Feeling unimportant in this current situation, and is looking for different conditions where she will be able to better prove her worth and importance." (Okay.)

* My Actual Problem #2 (Great, I have more than one??): "Fears she will be held back from achieving things she really wants, leading her to search endlessly for satisfaction and become involved in activities which are pointless." (Yes, yes, yes!)

Wow! So that was crazy-accurate and not all that flattering...lol! Hope y'all don't hate me after reading this :(

Oh, and this is totally random, but it's really windy here, and when the wind whips around this new house, it whistles like a ghost. It is so amazing! Wind is, like, my FAVORITE!!! So yeah.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Personal Favorites Continued...

(I can only upload like five per post, so I gotta have two posts :D)

Facebook Flairs!

My personal favorites...

Friday, March 27, 2009

Guests and More Procrastinating (Only it's hardly even my fault this time ;) )

Tonight some people are coming to our house for this meeting my mom is doing for Classical (the homeschool program we do), and they're going to spend the night. We've been cleaning all day, I barely got ANY school work done, which is HORRIBLY bad news because I really need to be doing a lot of stuff. My philosophy presentation is like halfway done, and it has to be ready to present (which means I need to LEARN IT) on Tuesday. *gulp*

I know, I know. You're asking "So why aren't you working on it NOW instead of BLOGGING about it?"

Answer: Uhhhhhhh....*cough* slacker *cough*

I did paint my nails today though. Or really I re-painted them. They're this awesome sparkly hot pink.

I have a mouth ulcer where my bottom right canine tooth is cutting my lip. It's so weird. I didn't think your own body was supposed to hurt itself.

I haven't written any Mirror lately. Well, like two days ago and like a sentence yesterday, but it all sucks. I don't know what's wrong. Page thirty and up I feel like I need to SERIOUSLY work on.

Whoa, I just got really dizzy and now I'm seeing spots...I'm pretty sure that's not a good thing. Oh well.

Today we finally put this cabinet thing in place between the wall and the fireplace. THAT was an ordeal, let me tell you. We measured the space before the rock was put on the fireplace, so when the rock was put in, the cabinet (which is HUGE and REALLY heavy) didn't fit. So today, this guy and his daughter, who's my age, came over to help my mom and dad put the cabinet in place. It took like an hour and I thought my dad was gonna get his head smashed (too hard to explain). It was crazyyyyyy.

So, that's another reason why I got next to no school work done. And unfortunately tomorrow is Saturday, so I probably won't work then either. (*Cue stomach knot*)

*MOAN* I don't know what I'm gonna do. I'll let you know if I die of stress or fail ninth grade or something.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

The Scarlet Pimpernel and Organized Chaos

Hi! Sorry about that forest post. The boredom of today was getting to my head. I'm not bored anymore though.

After watching episodes of I Dream of Jeanie until I was ready to shoot myself, I discovered a giant box of my stuff that hadn't been unpacked yet! YAY! I had something to do! I started unpacking and did that for about an hour. Then I went upstairs to fix frozen pizzas for dinner.

Yeah, I made dinner. Me. Kendra. YES, ME, OKAY?! I know I'm super not the cooking type, but I made pizzas anyway (what skillz, right?). It wasn't my idea, it was my dad's, but oh well. I can do dinner once a week. Not a problem. Hopefully.

Anyway, so I didn't burn the pizzas, but my room is a wreck now. I have half the box unpacked (it really was huge), but a lot of it I don't even want anymore. I'm just gonna give it away or store it in the attic or something. *shrugs* I don't know. But it is NOT going in my beautiful new room. Lol! I'm not really a super neat person , but I want to keep this room nice. (Organized and neat are not the same thing. I'm organized, but messy. I know where everything is, but no one else can ever find anything. Organized chaos. That's me.)

So in a second, I'm gonna try to get some sort of order back in my room before eight o'clock when the family is going to watch The Scarlet Pimpernel on TV. I reeeeeally hope it's the version with Jane Seymore and Anthony something in it. I haven't seen the "other" version, but I love the Jane/Anthony one so I hope it's that one.

The Scarlet Pimpernel is a really good movie. I highly recomend it. It's about a man who helps aristocrats escape the guillotine during the French Revolution. But it's not like a documentary or anything (considering that didn't really happen, duh), though. It's a really cool love story with lots of cool history and action and plotting and clever people. (No cute guys, but hey, the plot is better than a lot of stuff with hotties in it ;) )

Well, off to unpack! Have a good evening! Carpe noctem!

The Forest

I googled "beautiful," looking for a cool picture to post since I don't have anything real to say. I found this. I don't know why, but for some reason this picture is breathtaking to me. I really don't know why, but I think it's just really beautiful. There's something mysterious, mystical and almost dangerous about it. It's happy-looking, and yet if I were walking down the path, I think I'd feel sort of nervous; like someone was going to jump out at me at any second. I don't know. It's just a really intriguing picture to me.
You can kind of tell a lot from the picture, too, when you think about it. (I tend to overanalyze things just a bit :D) For one thing, we know it's summer because of all the leaves on the trees (and they don't look like evergreen trees). And we know that it hasn't rained extremely recently because there aren't any ruts in the road, and the road is dry even though it's shaded. And we know that the road is traveled most likely by cars because of the tracks and condition of the road. But we also know that it isn't in a drought because the grass and trees are flourishing, and the road isn't bone-dry, it's just not wet. Although, the quality of the light does make it seem like it might be a bit overcast. It's hard to tell with all the trees, though. It could just be that the light is so filtered that it only appears thin. Someone with more knowledge of plants and stuff could tell you what type of trees there are in the forest.
Okay. Sorry. That was really weird and random of me to do that. *shakes head* Anyway...
This little clip of the picture somehow doesn't do it justic. It was so big I had to crop it to get it to fit. Here's the link to the full picture: http://legacyofwisdom.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/beautiful-nature-la.jpg

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Debates and Movie Dates (a.k.a. NOTHING)

TORI AND I WON DEBATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes! I'm very excited about that. Affirmative, y'all did really well. Congrats! (Btw, I have never been on the losing team in debate. Ever. In four years of debate. I'm not bragging, I'm just saying I have a crazy lucky streak going. It can't last much longer. I probably just jinxed myself...that would suck, lol!)

Anyway, I had a KILLER headache this afternoon and around dinnertime, but it went away, so that's cool :)

Hopefully I will be watching Ferris Beuler's Day Off with my dad in like...four minutes. Hopefully. I'm not entirely convinced that A: I will remember that I'm looking forward to that in four minutes and totally forget to go upstairs and remind my dad and B: that he will be finished working enough to watch with me. We'll see.

Update on my possible eating problem: false alarm or something. My stomach doesn't hurt anymore. Maybe it was little virus or something. I dunno.

Creepy is okay. I don't feel blocked right now but I haven't really written anything for a few days (no, I wrote like a couple of paragraphs yesterday).

I'm kind of tired. I wasn't tired this morning when I got up (which is weird for me), but now I am. *shrugs*

I'm rambling. Sorry. Hang on; let me think of something of substance to say...


Sorry. I've always wanted to do that though.

Well, it's 7:00! I'm gonna go poke my dad and see if we're gonna watch Ferris! TTYL!

Carpe diem!!

Sunday, March 22, 2009


Got "Twilight" the movie yesterday, watched it today.


Can't wait for the "New Moon" moive (November 20th, this year. Never too early to get psyched up about it :D :D)

Don't have much time, so I'll do a quick run-though of my life:

Debate is going well.
Creepy is NOT. I'm at a standstill and I don't know why.
I "just" found out I have another 3 to 5 minute speech due in about four weeks.
I need another hair cut. I feel like my hair is too long. AGAIN.
Math is okay...haven't really done much of it this week :D
Science, I'm trying not to think about.
I am really P.O.-ed at my computer right now.
No one is reading Carpe Noctem. Which is sad.
Hardly anyone is reading THIS blog anymore, also sad.
I think I have an eating problem (will expand on this in a second).
I'm afraid one of my friends might be anorexic (will NOT expand on this).
I was feeling really good inside until I started explaining my life point by point.

Okay, eating problem expansion! Every time I eat much, I feel really sick and my stomach gets all crampy. Maybe I have chrome's disease (or however you spell it). I'm significantly freaked out, but it could just be me.

*sniff sniff* I'm hungry :(

Bye! :D

P.S. I have mood swings a lot...

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Hate and Anger

What started out as the best evening ever just ended horribly.

I don't want to talk about it. I'm so angry I can't type straight, think straight, speak straight, or walk straight. Sometimes, I really hate my family.

Check it out!

Hey! Check out Carpe Noctem for my new post! (Carpe Noctem is updated weekly)

Feminism: Celebrating the Difference

Friday, March 20, 2009

Debate, Aristotle, and the Weirdest Paragraph EVER (haha, now you're gonna read it just to hear the weird paragraph :D)

Okay, I know this sounds crazy, but I actually forgot about this blog for a few days... Haha, sorry!

Well, this week has been okay. Definitely have had worse, definitely have had better. Debate is moving right along. I finally got my butt in gear, and I think my partner and I can win this!! w00t w00t! :) We're debating whether or not the US should call a constitutional convention. My personal oppinion is strongly NO WE SHOULD NOT, but we won't know if we'll be arguing for or against it until we get to class Tuesday, so we have to prepare for both sides. Yikes! I'm kind of nervous, mostly excited. After all, this isn't SUPPOSED to be a huge competition, I just feel like it is. It's really just friendly practice, haha! But when it comes to debate, for me, it's all business ;)

I started (sort of...) my philosophy project this week. I found out it's due a little earlier than I expected...yikes again...I'm doing an oral report (*cough* boring report *cough*) on Aristotle and his philosophy. Aristotle is my favorite out of the famous trio of Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle. Socrates is best known for "inventing" the Socratic method, which is getting someone to understand something by asking questions. He believed that deep down, everyone has all the answers, it's just a matter of digging them out.

Plato believed that there was/is another "realm" where all the ideas for creations come from. He believed that in the Realm of Ideas, there is a perfect copy of everything, and all the things we see on Earth are just duplicates that are sometimes not quite right. For instance, if you look at six black lab dogs, they aren't all going to look exactly alike, are they? But you can tell what all of them are, because their Idea, or their Mold, is the same. Plato thought that in the Realm of Ideas, there exists kind of a "black lab dog mold" and all black labs are made from that mold, they just don't all come out exactly "right." Like when you're making cookies. You use the same gingerbread mold, but each cookie looks a little bit different, right? Same idea.

Aristotle, who was tutored by Plato, disagreed with his mentor on almost every fundamental point possible. Aristotle believed that THIS world, the physical world is the real world. Not some dreamy "Idea Realm." Aristotle was a huge realist. Not many people really got along with him. He was sort of a know-it-all.

I know you're probably wondering why I picked the boring, physical world know-it-all instead of the cool "true insight comes from within" or Mr. "Realm of Ideas." You'd think that someone as obsessed with fantasy and weird opinions and "kooks" would go for Plato. But the reason why I like Aristotle is that he argued with Plato. Really. That's my "big" reason. I just like the fact that he had the guts to stand up to his mentor who was universally known as a genius. Plato had his own SCHOOL, of which Aristotle was just a lucky pupil. And he still stood up to Plato and had the courage to buck him. I admire that. Don't know exactly why, but I do.

Now, if you aren't asleep already, this will surely do it for ya! ;) I'm going to talk about my book. Before you run screaming, I just want to get in one exciting annoucment: I HIT SEVENTY THOUSAND WORDS LAST NIGHT!!! I've got seventy-one thousand now. Oh, yeah! Lol! The story is beginning to wind down. A lot of semi-crucial events left, but we're getting to the end. (Haha, I say "we". I. I am getting to the end. You have to remember, Kendra, YOUR BOOK IS NOT STINKIN' PUBLISHED YET. You are a NOBODY at this point.) Haha, anyway, I'm estimating I have around forty to fifty-ish pages to go before my rough draft is done. I'm so excited! This is the longest thing I've ever written/stuck with/tried to finish/come up with that's actually interesting-ish. Yeah, all of those! YES! I may actually finish this!

Okay, so one more small random thing: I think about all the negative stuff (like, SERIOUSLY), so I've considered the possibility that I could potentially die/get killed before Creepy (Er, The Mirror) is finished. So (haha, this is possibly the weirdest paragraph I've ever written), if I do die, Ellie B, Gabrielle, Kyle Hendricks, and Lizzy are in charge of finishing Creepy for me. Okay? Haha...just thought I'd say that. And now I'm thinking I shouldn't have because that was REALLY weird. (I am considering backspacing this...)

Well, if you're reading it, guess I decided not to. :D Have a great weekend, and remember,

Carpe diem!

-especially if you have an unfinished novel going.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Good Ol' Saint P and Other Stuff ;)

Dia duit!

That's "hello" in Irish in honor of St. Packtrick's Day! Today is awesome, because green is the best color EVER. But I have a confession to make:

I didn't wear green today :(

I don't have any green shirts at the New House yet! I know, it sucks, doesn't it? Oh well. Guess what? St. Patrick wasn't even FROM Ireland! He was just a missionary to Ireland. He was actually Welsh, I believe. And do you know why the shamrock is the symbol of St. Patrick's Day? Anyone? Anyone? (Haha, go watch "Ferris Beuller's Day Off") Well. St. Patrick used the shamrock as an example of how the trinity works: Father, Son, and Holy Spirt are all seperate, and yet one at the same time.

Personally, I don't like the analysis all that much. After all, the three different "branches" of God can be seperate altogether and still function, whereas who ever heard of a one-leafed shamrock? LOL! Still, you gotta meet people where they are, and I guess a shamrock was a readily availible and effective example for St. Patrick to use. *shrugs*

Class was good today. I wonder if last night was a full moon, 'cause we were pretty crazy today! The crazy days are always the best :)

Creepy is going okay. Not amazing, but it's DEFINITELY been worse (haha, y'all know that). I hit 63,000 words the other day (YES!!), and it's up to 120 pages! Hooray! In the words of London Tipton, "yay, me!" :P

Ohhhh! Awesome news! (Don't get your hopes up; it's not THAT great, lol!) I bought this really cute dress today!! Okay, my parents did, but this is a big deal because I usually only wear dresses about three times a year: Easter, and usually there are at least one wedding or funeral in a year. Yeah. I realy don't wear dresses that much, LOL! But this one is sooooo cute! It's green and pink-purple and teal and all swirly and abstract flowery. Okay, that description just made the dress sound really ugly. But it isn't. Really. It's short and it's got this belt and these little sleeves...okay, I know you're thinking that for a writer, I can't describe stuff worth crap. Lol! Oh well. It's cute, anyway :)

Alrighty. That's my day just about. Thought about green (best color ever), had a great day at class, thought about St. Patrick and his iffy analysis, found out how to say "hello" in Irish (wouldn't that be Gaelic, though? *shrugs*), and bought an adorable dress! :D

Not bad.

Carpe that diem!

Saturday, March 14, 2009

The Promise

I've decided to post my short stories here! Some of them are too personal (I have a habit of putting people and events disguised into my stories, and some of it isn't so disguised...), but most of them I don't mind. Don't even THINK about stealing my work.

HAH! You thought about it! You thought about it! Lol, just kidding. But seriously. I really don't think any of y'all would do that, but I'm just saying "don't" anyway.

My very most favorite short story is called "Cinderella's Fairy Godmother," but it's not on this computer and I can't get it from the other computer because it doesn't have internet so I can't email it to myself and I don't have a flash drive. GRRR! So, I'll have to post a more mediocre story. >:( The one I'll be doing is called "The Promise." And I hate it. HATE IT. It's soooooooooooo cheesy. *rolls eyes* Okay, here it is. (I don't mind if you comment on how cheesy it is. It doesn't bother me.)

Written Friday, January 30th, 2009

Addie looked up at the stars and tried to not think about her brother. The wind blew. Addie shivered. She felt warm wetness fill her eyes. The night was very black; the stars were very white. Suddenly, everything blurred and Addie felt the wetness trail down her cheeks and turn cold, like her heart. Her heart felt very cold and very warm at the same time. Cold because she was so lonesome. Warm because the hurt for her brother was so hot and real. She felt rooted to the spot, but she knew that if she didn't stop stargazing and go inside she would fall apart.

In an enormous exercise of willpower, Addie pulled herself inside the mud and straw hut she was forced to call home and shut the door behind her. The hut was empty of life, excepting herself, of course, and even Addie did not feel very alive.

She did not eat the hunk of bread that usually sufficed for her supper, but went straight to her straw tick mattress and lay down. When she closed her eyes, a few more tears slid down her nose and temples. She could not stop thinking about her brother. She wanted to forget him. To remember would only make her unhappy. But still she clung desperately to the memory of his smile, his green eyes that sparkled, his messy brown hair, his strong tan arms that had held her when she was frightened as a child.

A broken sob tore from Addie's tightly shut mouth. He was gone forever. She had loved him so much, and now he was gone. She would likely never see him again. Slaves from different masters rarely saw each other. Addie felt almost as if he had died. She was glad he was in the world somewhere, even if he would never be with her. At least he would be with someone. He could help someone else, she supposed. But he ought to here all the same, helping her.

Addie desperately covered her ears, trying to block out the inner voice that screamed out every memory she had of him, reciting them almost just to torture herself. If this pain was the only link to him, so be it.

But Addie would not forget. She refused to forget. He would live in her memory forever. She would miss him forever and ever.

So Addie lay there missing him. Missing the way he laughed at her fears and explained how he would protect her from them. Missing the sound of that laugh. Missing the sparkle of his eyes. Missing his rough hands when they joined with hers to pray over their meager dinners. Missing him confiding in her about his dreams of freedom. Missing him explaining things to her that she didn't understand.

Missing his face.

Missing his presence.

Missing him.

Addie missed him very much. And she always would. No one would ever replace him as long as she lived. She felt very sure of that.

She wondered if he could possibly be missing her as much as she missed him. She didn't think so. She could see how that was possible. She dreadfully hoped he did miss her. She felt sure he would. He had always felt strongly about her. He had been very particular about the way his friends treated her. And he had promised Addie that if they ever got separated, he would do everything he could to get them back together.

To get them back together.

Addie suddenly sat straight up on her mattress.

Maybe there was hope. Maybe he really would find a way that they could be together again.
The tears ran faster, warmer than before, because this time, they were joyful tears, hopeful tears. Her brother would find her. He would see that they were reunited. He had never broken a promise before. Of course he would come! Oh why hadn't she thought of this before?
Addie suddenly felt very tired. She smiled and lay back down. He would come for her. Everything would be alright.

With that promise in mind, she drifted pleasantly off to sleep.

Addie awoke with the Promise in mind. She got dressed with the Promise in mind. She ate breakfast with the Promise in mind. She went to work in the fields with the Promise in mind. She came home to her hut with the Promise in mind. She ate her supper with the Promise in mind, and she went to bed again with the Promise in mind.

This went on for over a year.

Addie's brother never came. For the first few weeks, and even months, Addie's hope never swayed, never died, never faltered. But after a year, the terrible feeling that her brother had not kept his promise began to weigh on her with a tremendous force. She told herself he would come yet, she had only to wait.

A few days into year two without her brother, a messenger came who had the same master as Addie's brother. Addie ran into the messenger but by chance. The messenger met her in the field while she was working and said to her,

"Excuse me, I'm from Master Rode and I was wondering if you could point me to the main house, please?"

Addie could barely breathe. Master Rode was who had bought her brother.

"My brother," Addie managed breathlessly. "Do you know my brother?" The messenger frowned and asked who her brother was. Addie told him. The messenger's face lit up.

"Oh! I know him. Yes, everyone does. He's a favorite of everyone's, the master's, too," he answered. Addie was suddenly filled with hope.

"Then you might answer a question about him for me?" she asked. The messenger said he would. "Is he…is my brother trying…to…see me?" The messenger knew what she meant. To the slaves, "trying to see someone" meant trying to runaway to visit a friend or family member.
Addie waited anxiously for the reply. Of course, she already knew her brother was trying to see her, but it would be nice to hear someone else say it. The messenger hesitated, and Addie's heart stopped.

"I'm afraid not," he said finally. Addie stared.

It felt like the world had crashed—and landed on her, too. It honestly seemed like her vision had shattered, or turned to black and white. One of them, or maybe both. It was hard to tell with the tears and everything.

The messenger seemed very sorry.

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news," he muttered. "I'm terribly sorry." Addie shook her head and swallowed her tears.

"No, it isn't your fault," she said. Her voice was shrill. She trembled. "But…do you know…why?" The messenger looked down and shrugged.

"No, please! Tell me," Addie cried. The tears were back. The messenger looked up.
"He says he likes the new Master's estate," he mumbled. "He's afraid to come for you. He doesn't want to upset things with Master Rode."

Addie felt very sick inside. Her heart hurt, too. She thanked the messenger, pointed him in the direction of the main house, and fled to her hut.

She burst through the door and shut it behind her. Everything she knew and felt and ever dreamed of shattered. He wouldn't come. He liked his new life better. All the togetherness hadn't mattered to him apparently.

Addie lay down on her mattress and cried until someone came and made her go back to work. She did work. She worked, ate, breathed, and slept every few days.

But she didn't feel the same towards her brother. Or anyone else. Ever.

Not ever again.

At least, she hasn't yet.

Lol, CHEEEEEESY! And mostly just plain stupid. I wrote it fast when I was bored. All the short stories I like are on that other computer I told you about. GRR.

I'll post better ones later. Eventually. As soon as I can find a flashdrive.

Maybe I'll go into an analysis of this story tomorrow...depends on how bored I am, haha! TTYL! Thanks for reading!



I know. I should be thrilled to know freaking end. This is my first Saturday in SIX WEEKS that I haven't had to get up for driver's ed!!!!!!! But I actually...might sorta kinda a little bit maybe miss it.

I know. I'M A FREAK!! There, I said it for you. But I miss seeing people every Saturday. And frankly, sleeping in is over-rated. DID I JUST SAY THAT??? I did, didn't I?? Well, it kind of shoots the whole day in the foot if you ask me. Getting up at 11 is not ideal after all. Who woulda thought?

Well, in honor of my random hyperness (I did not even have caffeine or chocolate) and supreme boredness, I have compiled a bunch of random quotes that I love! Some of them are humorous, some of them actually hold wisdom.

And I'm not gonna tell you what is what. BWAHAHAHHA!

Okay. I definitely got too much sleep.

(My favorites are in bold and italics, and my little comments are in these parenthesis :D)

1. "I have CDO. It's like OCD but all the letters are in alphabetical order. Like they should be." --Mr. IHaveNoIdea

2. "I mentally correct your grammar while you're speaking." --Mrs. IHaveNoIdea

3. "You know you're too close to the characters in your novels when you lose sleep worrying about them." (This TOTALLY doesn't happen to me....heheheh :D) --IDK

4. "Unless life also hands you water and sugar, your lemonade's gonna suck." (LOLS!) --I promise we'll get to the quote that I know who said them. (Did that make ANY sense?)

5. "Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. Others don't." --Guess? Yup. IDK.

6. "You can't cross a sea by merely staring into the water." - Rabindranath Tagore

7. Never tell anyone that you're writing a book, going on a diet, exercising, taking a course, or quitting smoking. They'll encourage you to death. - Lynn Johnston

8. We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

9. There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes. - Doctor Who

10. Writing well mean never having to say, 'I guess you had to be there.' - Jef Mallett

11. “If you have not done things worthy of being written about, at least write things worthy of being read.” –Giacomo Cassanova

12. “There are three rules for writing the novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.” - W. Somerset Maugham

13. “My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened,” –Michel de Montaigne (I love that one!)

14 . “The world is full of people whose notion of a satisfactory future is, in fact, a return to the idolized past.” –Robertson Davies

15. “Punctuality is the virtue of the bored.” –Evelyn Waugh

16. "Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say."- Anon

17. "A loyal friend laughs at your jokes when they’re not so good, and sympathizes with your problems when they’re not so bad."

18. "A friend knows the song in your heart and sings it to you when your memory fails."

19. "Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art.... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. "
~ C.S. Lewis

20. "The past is not a package one can lay away." ~Emily Dickinson

21. "You [men] are not our protectors.... If you were, who would there be to protect us from?" ~Mary Edwards Walker (Weird, but kinda profound.)

22. "If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster." --Isaac Asimov

24. "History will be kind to me for I intend to write it." --Winston Churchill

25. "When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." --Mark Twain (I love this one :D)

26. "Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction." --
Antoine de Saint-Exupery

27. "Love makes mutes of those who habitually speak most fluently." --Madeleine de Scudery

28. "Love does not alter the beloved, it alters itself." --Søren Kierkegaard

Ta ta da da da! :D Yes. I was THAT bored :D

Friday, March 13, 2009

Ehh, not much, but all good!

I have had a very wonderful and...interesting day.

I got a ton of school work done. Still grappling with my philosophy project, but my science research paper is going well and so is MATH! WOW! Creepy is going okay, and my dog is getting used to the invisible fence just fine.

I feel kind of sick right now, but I'll be okay in a little while probably, lol! Will probably post something of more significance later, but who knows?

Oh, and check this out: http://toseizethenight.blogspot.com/

w00t w00t!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

*stares at screen...raises an eyebrow...and types this*

Sorry for that really depressing, complaining post last night. I just felt really bad. I'm a little better today.

Oh, but more bad news :( You know how I wanted to have my party on FEBRUARY 13th since that was a Friday the 13th? And then we didn't move so I couldn't? But then we moved and there was a MARCH Friday the 13th? So I was gonna do it then? (Sorry. Like, everything's a question...) Well, now I'm not having it this Friday the 13th either. Because some people couldn't/can't come. :( It sucks, right? *sigh*

School starts back up today. Hmmm. Ugh. Debate (gahhhh!), physical science (*sob*), literature (yay!), Latin (*MOAN*), philosophy (give me that philosophy book!!), math (help me), american government (so...?). AHHHH! I hate this. Summer can't come fast enough. Debate is killing me. And not only me, my partner as well!! It's not fair of me. I MUST DO BETTER RESEARCH. Math...ehh. I'll get it eventually. You know. Before I die anyway. Physical science is kind of like the nightmare that never ends. Latin is about the same as physci.

I know, I know. Shut up, stop complaining, close the blogging window, AND GET THE HECK TO WORK. Okay. I will.


And maybe this is cheesy, and I don't know what your thoughts are about God or anything, but pray for me to do my work well today. I always go into it thinking I'm gonna do amazing today, but I always...don't. Or rarely do. I know I can do really well! I just don't. So, pray for me, y'all!

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

On Second Thought

My dog is sad.

I have a cold or allergies or something cause I feel like CRAP today.

I can't sleep here.

This house is too big.

My room is always freezing, and the main floor is always hot. (I'm used to it being the other way around, and I LIKED IT THAT WAY, THANKS.)

Our water tastes NASTY.

I love cable TV.

And...that was my day.

Oh, yeah, and class was awesome.

Monday, March 9, 2009


Hi! This is Kendra Logan, proud owner (okay, my parents own it) of a beautiful, gorgeous, amazing, awesome, perfect, TERRIFIC NEW HOUSE! HALAAAAAAA! I love it, love it, love it, LVOE IT. I can't get over the fact that I LIVE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The first day I went around the house jumping around like a six year old. *shakes head at self* This place is just what I've always wanted. Lots of people in the neighborhood, too. Yesterday was the best day of my life. Kids were everywhere. I loved it.

The only bad part about this is that my poor dog is so confused. We put up an invisible fence, and she's so freaked out. She doesn't let us all leave, either. She's terrified that we're gonna leave her or something. Poor doggy. I feel so bad for her.

My room is amazing. Blue and green and everything matches and it's AMAZING. The only bad part about this is that I will still have to do school work.

Oh well.

Best. House. Ever.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Omg, I totally forgot that I was gonna start putting pictures in my posts. Whoops! Okay, here's one for that last post.

Packrat Slacker

Hi! Not a lot of school today! The big thing is debate. I need to get goin'. I've been a little (*cough* a lot *cough*) lazy lately. And it's not fair to my partner. So, I'm going to buckle down and read the whole stinkin' Constitution today and come up with reasons for why the US should call a Constitutional Convention. :D Whoopee. No, really, the topic is kind of interesting. It's just the debate part is a little (a lot) overwhelming (is that one word?) the way we have to put it together.

Hmm, wrote some Creepy yesterday. Not a lot, not so great, but I wrote something. Today (AFTER debate) I'm gonna try some more.

That is, if I'm not packing. My mom told me that this afternoon I have to start packing up my room. *sigh* That's gonna be a heck of a job. I went through a bunch of little kid books last night and this morning to see if I wanted to keep any of them. Aww! They bring back such memories! Lol, the Barbie books are so funny. I can remember loving them as a little kid.

As for going through all my other stuff, ughh. Not looking forward to it. I have so much crap (did I just say that?) in my room. A lot of it has "sentimental value." Hah. I'm such a packrat. EVERYTHING has sentimental value almost. I would keep everything if my mom wasn't like NO. *sigh* Oh well. It's gotta be done. Wish me luck!

Off to do debate, a little math, and then...PACKING! AHHHHH! :) TTYL!

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Happinews! ;)

Hi! Wow! All good news today!

Yesterday, it snowed about FIVE INCHES!! How awesome is that?? We haven't had snow like that since I was ten years old. I made a giant snowball and just messed around in the snow. It was a blast!

Class was canceled today, but I didn't do any school work yesterday, so I have to catch up today. Other than that, though, it looks like a super easy week! Yay! That way I can really concentrate on driver's ed homework and studying for the final. Everyone says it's really not hard to pass, but I would absolutely DIE if I failed and had to do this course again. *shudders*

Creepy is going okay. I don't feel stuck right this second. I haven't tried to write yet (and I'll have to do school before I can), but it feels like the mental block might be gone. Yay again!

Wow, it feels much better to be posting positive stuff rather than griping the whole post. I bet it's funner to read, too! I've been working TONS on my website, so check it out again! http://sites.google.com/site/themirrorbook/ I have pictures for almost all of the characters now, too. You can finally see what Paige and Darren look like!

Well, I better go. I have math and science that need to be tackled, and I have to do something about my philosophy project. I don't want to do the idea I've chosen, so I'm scrambling for a way to get out. *sigh* Oh well. I know what I have to do:

Carpe diem!


Oh, yeah, and listen to this awesome song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKLpJtvzlEI

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Good News, Bad News

Good news: finally have "Colors of the Wind" out of my head.
Bad news: now I have a Hilary Duff song stuck in my head and she seriously irritates me.
Good news: next to no driver's ed work this week.
Bad news: still stuck-ish in Creepy.
Good news: It's supposed to snow tonight.
Bad news: I highly doubt it will.

Other than that, not much has been going on. Creepy is really bugging me though. I can't get going. I honestly feel like the last...46 pages are crap. I lost my touch, the plot isn't tight, it's boring, I hate it, AHHH! No idea what to do. I have an ending (sort of...maybe...), but that isn't even any consolation.

I really am sorry that I'm being so grumpy and gloomy lately. But I have to complain somewhere. I haven't been writing in my journal lately, so I need to say it somewhere:

1. I lost $11.99 because SOMEONE, who shall remain nameless, turned off the computer while I was downloading an album off iTunes. (If you're reading this, SOMEONE, I'm not mad. I'm just saying all the stuff that's gone wrong this week.)
2. I've been cold for over 48 hours straight. Or at least I was. I'm okay now.
3. Creepy sucks.
4. I have a stupid Hilary Duff song in my head and it WON'T GO AWAY. I liked "Colors of the Wind" better than this!!
5. Haven't started my huge philosophy project yet, and I don't want to do the idea I chose but I'm stuck with it now and if it bombs it's going to be really embarrassing because of the type of project.
6. Something that I don't feel like telling the whole world.
7. My computer is being a total piece of freaking CRAP lately. Half the time the internet won't load AT ALL, and the other half it won't load fast AT ALL.
8. Writer's block.
9. Journal block.
10. Haven't heard from Shur'tugal people and it's really starting to annoy me.

Okay, sorry. Just venting. You don't have to say you're sorry for me if you don't want to. I know I've been moping a lot lately and y'all's suggestions really helped me :) Thanks, y'all! You rock! I promise I'll get cheerier soon (ish...). Especially after we move.

OHHHHHHH!! I didn't tell you the best news I don't think! We get to move this weekend! We had thought it might be months, but we'll move this weekend! Yay!! :) :) :) :) :)

Oh! And happy March, everyone! :)